Have we really achieved gender equality?
Have we really achieved gender equality?

Charu Posted on 01 Jan 1970

Whenever a girl is born...in any family or any class, be it a rich family, poor, middle class, single parents and many more. What is the first thought when they hold their baby girl? Obviously pretty,princess,daddy's lil girl,Lakshmi,cute,beautiful,adorable etc. But did you actually thought about her future, her personality or her life? First thought at this time is their safety...to keep them safe from all world's cruel people.

Have you ever noticed that a girl be of any age...they are always told this thing or dialogue or their lifetime mantra"Learn it before your marriage...if you don't do it properly... your in-laws will say, "don't know what her parents have taught her, she can't even do this thing properly"damn...".You tell her to learn this, do this, excel in each field...education, cooking, manners, behavior, clothing, beauty and hell lot of things. On the other hand, boys have been told a few things like education, bodybuilding, manhood, making money, business, politics, etc.

Why is this that girls are trained to be perfect from a very small and tender age? Why they are sort of given training to be a wife? As soon as a girl reaches an age of 18+, parents start looking for a boy and in that, they will look at the boy's income, property, job profile, looks etc.Ok...I get it that parents are concerned about her settled future, comfort and happiness. But do you really think this gonna help her? 

Seat properly, dress properly, eat properly, don't talk with boys, don't hang out with boys, cook delicious food, etc. Even if her brother is sitting ideal and playing game in the phone and she is doing a hell lot of work...she will be asked to do a work not him. If she ever does anything which is not permitted by parents or relatives, she will be beaten by such harsh words that she will never have the strength to do things which she likes or want to do, they threaten to her that she will be slapped, killed, burned and what not. I know there are families who treat their children equally and give girls their freedom to do anything and grow in a lovely environment.

In this training period of age, 3yr-20yr+...you are giving instructions and command to do this and that..and she is also doing it. Later on, she will be given more commands which she will have to follow forcefully. Where is her life? her true happiness, her activities where she is completely herself and enjoy that time..?? At present everyone is saying and chanting this mantra that you know girls and boys are equal, given equal rights, equal opportunities blah blah blah. Where is gender equality in household work? Gender equality to let her feel free and do whatever she wants to do?.

I wanted to be a doctor but because of financial issues chose engineering stream. Did got an admission in best engineering college again the same problem. Wanted to play badminton, sing, dance my heart out, wanted to become a fashion designer and asked my parents to let me do these things...they had only one thing to say every time..."What will happen if you do all these things, they are waste of time and money, you won't learn anything with all these..go study and score good marks".Never went to an outing with my friends during school time, not even in college days except last year of my college I did go but had to lie that going for a competition with friends. I know lying is bad and you should not. Right now I am about to complete my PG and will be doing a job somewhere. But that won't be the field in which my interest and happiness lie.

In the end, I will say don't teach them to be a perfect wife to be a good daughter-in-law, good daughter, a perfect woman with no flaws. Teach her and give the training to be herself, live her dreams, to do anything she wants, be confident, fearless, independent, strong, be happy.GIve training to your sons about how to behave with girls, respect them, help them in households. We girls are not machines that you give input and every time the output should be perfect and correct. Let her have some flaws...to live her life. That's when we will actually achieve gender equality. Where they will not only respect each other but also live there heart out.


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